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OkCupid removes offensive question thanks to Mencap campaign supported by Medway couple

A dating website has removed a question asking whether people with low IQs should be allowed to have children, thanks to a campaign supported by a Medway couple.

Katy Dyer and Vince Burford joined other people with learning disabilities in calling on OkCupid to take down the offensive question.

The question read: “Would the world be a better place if people with low IQs were not allowed to reproduce?”

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Vince and Katy met on a course run by Mencap in Medway
Vince and Katy met on a course run by Mencap in Medway

Miss Dyer, 33, said the question was very discriminatory and her partner, Mr Burford, said it was disgusting.

She said: “A relationship is a human right; everyone is entitled to have a relationship, a person with a learning disability might just need a little bit more help.”

Mr Burford, 44, added: “A person with a low IQ or learning disability is still a living human being, and if they want to have a relationship or children then they can.”

Watch: Medway couple takes part in Mencap's campaign

After almost year of campaigning by the charity Mencap, the website has finally agreed to delete the question.

The couple took a liking to each other on Mencap’s Employ Me course, which helps adults with a learning disability find work, but were a bit shy.

Strood resident Miss Dyer said: “I could tell Vince had noticed me and I was also interested in him. The way that he looked at me just set the spark.”

One of the other people on the course gave them each other’s number so they could text, and the pair have now been dating for around six weeks.

Mr Burford, who lives in Chatham, said: “I think in a relationship it has to be 50-50, you have to trust the person you’re with at all times but also be able to have fun.”

He said he is a new age kind of man and is quite happy to watch Katy’s favourite programme Call the Midwife, and do the washing up.

“The advice I’d give to someone with a learning disability who’s looking to start dating is take it slow, get to know the person you’re seeing, find out their likes and dislikes and what you both enjoy,” he said.

“You don’t need to rush into anything. I’d also say, don’t try and hide your disability, just be who you are.”

The couple joined the campaign calling on OkCupid to remove the question from their website
The couple joined the campaign calling on OkCupid to remove the question from their website

Miss Dyer has also been offered a paid job with Mencap.

She said: “I wouldn’t have felt confident enough to apply for this if it wasn’t for the support of Mencap and I am really looking forward to starting this job because I love helping and meeting new people.”

OkCupid chief executive Elie Seidman said: “OkCupid has always been dedicated to inclusivity. Our track record of advancing the interests of marginalized groups is long and extremely clear.

“While Mencap may be well-intentioned, they are speaking out against an organisation which shares their aim of promoting the interests of people who have been discriminated against.”

OkCupid agreed to remove the question
OkCupid agreed to remove the question

He said questions are a core part of the site and are generated by staff and the public, but do not reflect OkCupid’s editorial point of view.

“The intention of these questions is to allow our members to take the answers of other members into account when choosing who they want to connect with,” he said. “In this way, OkCupid members can determine if another person’s ideology is in contrast to their own before they go on a date.

“If you do not want to date someone who has hate towards a marginalized group (and we hope that you don’t), we make that possible. Nonetheless, in this particular moment, when the world seems so divided, so full of animosity and fury, OkCupid is going to make one small gesture at lessening the noise. We have removed the question.”

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